18 Comments

Wow... This is hard. But if I must... F dumplings because I love dumplings of all kinds and it will always be a good time. Marry pasta because it's the stable home that will always be there for me. And I guess we're killing pizza, which I love but have definitely had more bad cardboard pizza in my life than bad pasta or dumplings. I'll still keep a picture of pizza in a frame by my window though... 😁

Expand full comment

Fuck pasta, marry pizza and kill dumplings. Sorry but what can I say? The heart wants what it wants.

Expand full comment

AGH. This is wild to choose. Marry pasta because of its endless varieties and you’re stuck with it forever. The other two make it tough because I love them both, but fuck dumplings. I don’t know how to explain it, but I just feel like dumplings would be a freak. Like pizza could get it, too, but dumplings can fuuuuck.

Expand full comment

WOW the balls - F pasta: always a winner, leaves you wanting more, luscious and unctuous. M dumplings: they're my first and forever love, comforting, a variety from cultures all over the world, and always a gift (dim sum even means little gift!). K pizza: (my bf would kill me for this one). Just have to do it.

Expand full comment

F pasta because pasta is so comforting and cozy and nice and I just want to swim in it.

M dumplings because they are my favorite thing and I want them contractually obligated to spend the rest of their lives with me.

K pizza because as much as I love pizza, my IBS stomach simply cannot handle it 🥲

Expand full comment
Feb 2, 2022·edited Feb 2, 2022

Kill Pizza, Fuck Pasta and Marry Dumplings :-) with a shout out of love to NYC's Chinatown

Expand full comment
Feb 2, 2022·edited Feb 2, 2022

First, I want to say this caused a whole fight with my partner. Me: Marry dumplings, fuck pizza, kill pasta. Him: marry pasta, fuck pizza, kill dumplings. I’d never ever ever in my life thought I’d say to kill pasta but dumplings have my heart lately. Bad day? Dumplings. Good day? Dumplings. Pizza is that risky choice you make here and there. Killing pasta will cause me to be in mourning forever but that’s ok.

Expand full comment

Kill pasta- yes, it is versatile, delicious and it feels like I’m being asked to cut off my left hand. So I’m just moving on.

F pizza, because pizza is like an ex you call while drunk. Yes, I may hate this choice the next day but dang did it feel good. Also, out of these three choices, which leaves oil all of your body (face, hands, arms) that you are okay with? (Much more than you can say for an ex)

Marry dumplings. It proceeds filled Italian pasta in historical timelines, so it has staying power. The shapes, folds, and fillings are so pretty to look at, so it’s photogenic. And you can’t tell me a tongbao doesn’t feel like a hug. So it’s loyal, good looking and comforting- yeah I would marry dumplings.

Expand full comment

Fuck dumplings, marry pasta and kill pizza!! Too many times I have been let down by soggy pizza feeling sick and bloated. At least pasta is able to get to the right texture without a pizza stone.

Expand full comment

Fuck pizza, marry pasta, kill dumplings-

I really really like pizza but If I only get to see it for the occasional drunken night of poor decisions, I’m okay with that. That’s when Pizza is the most appealing anyways.

Pasta? That bitch is forever. Endless ways to cook it, you can mix it with anything, it loves new ingredients, it’s so versatile. Pasta is always down for a threesome with wine, or cheese, or bread. Pasta keeps things fresh.

Dumplings are delicious. I’ll be sad to see them go, but sometimes you gotta make hard decisions.

Expand full comment

SO HARD! Marry pasta because I dream and crave pasta in every form every day. Ravioli, spaghetti, lasagna and with all the different sauces meat sauce, lemon pasta, brown butter. I could go on and on.

Fuck pizza because i just can’t quit you

And sadly kill dumplings

Expand full comment
Feb 1, 2022·edited Feb 1, 2022

My M is pizza because I absolutely f’ing love pizza. I’d totally F pasta because I wanna fall asleep immediately after I eat 2 or 3 bowls of it! Sorry dumplings…you’re delish, but I ain’t got no room left so you gotta go!

Expand full comment

Before we get into this spicy debate, let me say that FMK with food is one of my favorite conversation starters. And this is a hard one.

I’ll have to go with M Dumplings, F Pizza and K Pasta. Dumplings is a clear winner for me, I grew up on them and can’t live without those small bundles of joy! The latter two were hard but I love the toasty crunch of pizza along with the cheese pull and fun topping choices. Pasta is delicious as well but my heart (and gut) said to go with pizza.

On a side note, if pasta is inclusive of all noodles across cuisines then it would’ve overtaken dumplings because noodle soups are everything!

Expand full comment

I would f*ck dumplings simply because they could make me O every time I eat one. I would marry pasta because on your gloomiest day, a bite of pasta can bring you comfort and ease. Sadly ENOUGH kill pizza because sometimes pizza kills me.

Expand full comment

Such a hard question! I think F dumplings because they're so fun: fried, soup-filled, can be filled with anything.... Have to marry pasta because you can eat it any way - asian noodles, with tomatoes, pesto, meat etc etc etc and then that leaves pizza? We can kill it and stuff our dumplings/top our pasta with pizza-esque flavors

Expand full comment

Wow this is the hardest FMK ever!!! Inquiring minds want to know how we’re defining a dumpling 🧐 but we’ll assume we’re talking potstickers or something. I’m marrying pasta, I might have starchy pasta water running through my veins instead of blood. Pasta is my first love. Pasta is life so pasta is staying forever. Dumplings and pizza are neck and neck but I’m giving in to dumplings. There’s just something about that. Pizza I’ll miss you more than you could ever know but I have to kill you. Emily you’re wild for this one.

Expand full comment